resillience

Emma Mudge, Senior Psychological Wellbeing Practitioner at AXA Health

Tips to harness the power of positive thinking

Resilience

19 July 2023

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Why is considering how we think so important?

If you’re prone to negative thinking and find it tends to take over, there are things you can do to challenge unhelpful or unwanted thoughts. That’s not to say there isn’t a place for them, or you’ll never have them again, but ‘re-training’ yourself to develop a positive outlook can be a real game changer for your health and wellbeing, as well as your relationships with others. 

Is your glass half full or half empty? Are you optimistic or pessimistic? Our perception of the world around us can affect many areas of our physical and mental wellbeing; this includes how we deal with stress and our attitude towards ourselves and other people. The meaning we place on our experiences can influence how we feel and behave. A balanced perspective means that we can approach life’s ups and downs in a more constructive way that leaves us feeling more energised.

Unrealistic or unhelpful thinking patterns can cause and/or make us hold on to distressing or unwelcome feelings. They can also prompt us to behave in ways which supports or ‘validates’ these thinking patterns or maintains distressing feelings. The model used within CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy)1 suggests that the way in which we think can affect the way we feel and what we do. To help improve health, it can be beneficial to become more aware of the thoughts we experience and how we perceive the world, ourselves, and other people. Being able to identify and then challenge unhelpful thoughts can result in a more realistic or balanced perspective, helping us to be more resilient to life’s challenges.

Try these top tips to get a more balanced perspective

Become more aware and identify ‘triggers’. First you need to identify the areas of your life or situations where you notice you usually experience unhelpful2 or negative thoughts, whether at work, during social occasions or at home. For example, it could be something a friend has posted via social media, or something someone has said or done at work.

Check yourself. Periodically during the day, stop and evaluate what you are thinking. If you find that your thoughts are mainly negative, try to think about finding an alternative, more balanced way of thinking. Are your negative thoughts justified or irrational? Can you counter them with a more positive thought or a logical explanation?3 Read our article ‘How to stop worrying’ for helpful ideas to challenge worrisome thoughts.

Practice positive self-talk. Try this one simple rule: Don’t say anything to yourself that you wouldn’t say to anyone else. Be gentle and encouraging with yourself. If a negative or unhelpful thought enters your mind, evaluate it rationally and respond with affirmations, then replace with a more positive thought. Alternatively, ask yourself ‘What would I say to a friend in this situation?’ and use this to balance your response and be kinder to yourself.

Opinion vs fact. Our brains naturally evaluate the world around us and are very subjective and opinion-based; typically, we have an emotional response to a situation that drives the way we think. For example, if you walk past someone you know and say ‘Hello!’, but they don’t respond, you might feel embarrassed, annoyed, awkward, nervous and, often, the automatic reaction is to think ‘Did they deliberately ignore me?’ and ‘Do they dislike me?’. This is your interpretation of the situation, driven by your emotional response. The fact is that they walked past you without responding, anything else is opinion.

Be open to humour. Give yourself permission to smile and laugh, especially during difficult times. When you can laugh at life, you feel less stressed.

• Try to follow a healthy lifestyle by eating well and moving more. Physical activity has a positive effect on mood, helping to reduce stress and boost self-esteem. When you’re active, your brain releases dopamine and serotonin - the ‘feel-good’ chemicals, which are known to improve your mood.

Learn to manage your stress by doing the things you enjoy and with the people you love being with! When life’s busy it’s all too easy to cancel dinner dates or social events, but try to make time. If you’re lonely, don’t be afraid to reach out to people – they may be feeling lonely too. Sharing your worries or problems will leave you feeling more energised and able to deal with things.

• When you feel negativity creep in, stop for a minute, or ten, and take some deep breaths. Breathing properly can benefit your mind and body in a number of ways, from managing emotional, physical and mental stress to increasing performance at work or at a sport. Visit our #Headstrong page for some great videos featuring Richie Norton (AKA The Strength Temple) doing guided breath-work and movement.

Recognising negative thoughts is key to embracing a brighter outlook. If negativity persists and hinders your daily life, consult your GP for professional assistance. 

Explore our resilience hub for tools and tips on fostering a stronger, more positive mindset. For information on stress, anxiety, and depression, visit our mental health hub—an invaluable resource with articles, NHS factsheets, and more. 

References

  1. Cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) - NHS 
  2. Unhelpful thinking - NHS podcast. - NHS
  3. Think positive: 11 ways to boost positive thinking – Psychology today 

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